Today’s edition of “Oldies with the Old Guy” (last one for the Spring Semester) has been uploaded to Mixcloud and is available for your listening pleasure.  https://www.mixcloud.com/billdickerson/oldies-with-the-old-guy-05-02-17-live-shows-2016-2017/

Feel free to go to www.mixcloud.com ANY time you’re in the mood for Oldies  —  type “Bill Dickerson” into the Search Bar  —  and enjoy. . . 

But I digress  —  Today’s Mini-Monotony Breaker begins w/ some chalkboard advice from a filling station  —  that has a lot to say (and says it well.)  After seeing these, you may ask yourself as I did “Why aren’t more merchants around the world using this simple, but effective, means of stimulating interest???

A Johannesburg South Africa filling station has become quite a landmark in Gauteng with its daily #PetrolPumpWisdom – uplifting quotes written on a chalkboard. 

 

 Some motorists say they deliberately travel this route just to read the quote which brightens their day.

 Here’s A Selection:

The lady behind this wonderful initiative at Hutton Hyde Park is Alison Billett.

 She told SA People: “We inherited the board from the previous owner, Dick Hutton, when we bought the filling station from him almost 20 years ago.

“We continued the tradition and it has become a landmark 

– more so now that it’s on social media!

“Not a day goes by when I don’t get a call or a visit from someone to tell me how much they appreciate the message – it seems that every day there’s something that just speaks to what is going on in someone’s life and that inspires or motivates them.

“Having people come and tell me their stories and how the quote helped them in some small way is what motivates me to keep writing!

 “We use a variety of quotations – some are topical, some are funny, some are inspirational, some even reflect what is going on in my life that day!

 “Different things appeal to different people…

 “The boards were spotted by a motivational speaker from the UK, Geoff Ramm, when he was driving by one day and he was so taken by them he included a piece about them in his book!

 “The boards have appeared many times in newspapers and magazines and been spoken about on radio stations all over the world. 9GAG has re-tweeted them a few times too!”

 Bob 95 FM in the USA recently posted Alison’s “Rest in Peace” quote which has now been shared over a quarter of a million times around the world!

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Having just turned the “Big 70” a few weeks ago  —  the following hits a little “too close to home”. . .

Q:   Where can single men over the age of 70 find younger women who are interested in them?	A:   Try a bookstore, under Fiction.
Q:   What can a man do while his wife is going through menopause?	A:   Keep busy. If you’re handy with tools, you can finish the basement.  When you’re done, you will have a place to live.
Q:   Someone has told me that menopause is mentioned in the bible… Is that true? Where can it be found?	A:   Yes. Matthew 14:92: “And Mary rode Joseph’s ass all the way to   Egypt …”
Q:   How can you increase the heart rate of your over-70 year-old husband?	A:   Tell him you’re pregnant.
Q:   How can you avoid that terrible curse of the elderly wrinkles?	A:   Take off your glasses.
Q:   Seriously! What can I do for these crow’s feet and all those wrinkles on my face?	A:   Go braless. It will usually pull them out..
Q:   Why should 70-plus year old people use valet parking?	A:   Valets don’t forget where they park your car.
Q:   Is it common for 70-plus year olds to have problems with  short term memory storage?	A:   Storing memory is not a problem. Retrieving it is the problem.
Q:   As people age, do they sleep more soundly?	A:   Yes, but usually in the afternoon.
Q:   Where should 70-plus year olds look for eye glasses?	A:   On their foreheads.
Q:   What is the most common remark made by 70-plus year olds when they enter antique stores?	A:   “Gosh, I remember these!”

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And Finally. . .