Tuesday Morning’s “Oldies w/ the Old Guy” show experienced some technical difficulties — but it was recorded and is available for your listening pleasure with a simple click. https://www.mixcloud.com/billdickerson/oldies-with-the-old-guy-02-21-17-love-1968-1984/ (it’s really good???)
In the meantime — today’s Mini MB includes some amazing
“map facts” — and a couple “cuties”. Enjoy. . .
1.This map shows the world divided into 7 sections (each with distinct color) each section containing 1 billion people.
- This map shows (in white) where98 percent of Australia ‘s entire population lives.
- It may not come as a surprise but more people live inside the circle than outside of it
4. This map shows what is on the other side of the world from where you’re standing. For the most part it’s water.
5. Apparently you can’t get Big Macs everywhere. This map shows (in red) the countries that have McDonalds.
6. This map shows the countries (in blue) where people drive on the left side of the road
7. This map shows countries (in white) that England has never invaded. There are only 22. (In the WORLD!)
8. The line on this map shows all of the world’s Internet connections in 1969.
9. This map shows the countries that heavily restricted Internet access in 2013.
15. This is a map of the all the rivers in the United States .
17. This is a map of the highest paid public employees in the U. S. (Quite telling as to what our ‘priorities’ are.)
- This map shows how much space the United States would occupy on the moon.
Blonds strike back at the male gender. . .
A blonde man is in the bathroom and his wife shouts: “Did you find the shampoo?”
He answers, “Yes, but I’m not sure what to do… it’s for dry hair, and I’ve just wet mine.”
A blonde man shouts frantically into the phone, “My wife is pregnant and her contractions are only two minutes apart!”
“Is this her first child?” asks the Doctor.
“No!” he shouts, “this is her husband!”
A blonde man is in jail; the guard looks in his cell and sees him hanging by his feet.
“Just WHAT are you doing?” he asks.
“Hanging myself”, the blonde replies.
“The rope should be around your neck” says the guard.
“I tried that”, he replies, “but then I couldn’t breathe.”
A friend told the blonde man: “Christmas is on a Friday this year.”
The blonde man then said, “Let’s hope it’s not the 13th.”
Two blonde men find three grenades, and they decide to take them to a police station.
One asked: “What if one explodes before we get there?”
The other says: “We’ll lie and say we only found two.”
A woman phoned her blonde neighbor man and said: “Close your curtains the next time you and your wife are having sex. The whole street was watching and laughing at you yesterday.”
To which the blonde man replied: “Well the joke’s on all of you, because I wasn’t even at home Yesterday!!!
And finally. . .
LEARNING TO CUSS
A 6 year old and a 4 year old are raking the yard.
The 6 year old asks, “You know what? I think it’s about time we started learning to cuss.”
The 4 year old nods his head in approval.
The 6 year old continues,”When we go in for breakfast, I’m gonna say something with hell and you say something with ass.”
The 4 year old agrees with enthusiasm.
When the mother walks into the kitchen and asks the 6 year old what he wants for breakfast, he replies, “Aw, hell, Mom, I guess I’ll have some Cheerios.
WHACK! He flies out of his chair, tumbles across the kitchen floor, gets up, and runs upstairs crying his eyes out, with his mother in hot pursuit, slapping his rear with every step.
His mom locks him in his room and shouts, “You can stay there until I let you out!”
She then comes back downstairs, looks at the 4 year old and asks with a stern voice, “And what do YOU want for breakfast, young man?”
“I don’t know,” he blubbers, “but you can bet your fat ass it won’t be Cheerios!”