This week’s edition of “Oldies w/ the Old Guy” celebrates “International Women’s Day”  —  and does so in the “happiest” of ways (if you know what I mean) and has been uploaded to Mixcloud.  Check it out at https://www.mixcloud.com/billdickerson/oldies-with-the-old-guy-03-08-16-happy/

However, in the meantime  —  today’s Monotony Breaker is “particularly” interesting from a number of different perspectives  —  beginning w/ some “creative” signage.  Enjoy. . .

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A Wise Man once said. . .

1. We all love to spend money buying new clothes but we never realize that the best moments in life are enjoyed without clothes.2. Having a cold drink on a hot day with a few friends is nice, but having a hot friend on a cold night after a few drinks – Priceless.

   3. Breaking News: Condoms don’t guarantee safe sex anymore.  A friend of mine was wearing one when he was shot dead by the woman’s husband.

    4. Arguing over a girl’s bust size is like choosing between Molson, Heineken, Carlsberg, & Budweiser.  Men may state their preferences, but will grab whatever is available.
   
   5. A recent study found that women who carry a little extra weight live longer than the men who mention it.

   6. On average, an American man under 75 will have sex two to three times a week, whereas a Japanese man the same age will have sex only one or two times a year. This is very upsetting news to most of my friends, as they had no idea they were Japanese!

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Yesterday morning I bought two six packs of beer on sale at the Liquor Store in Ladysmith. I placed them on the front seat of the HHR and headed back home.

I stopped at the service station where a drop-dead gorgeous, almost blonde was filling up her car at the next pump.

    
It was very warm and she was wearing tight shorts and a light top which was wide open.
She glanced at the beer, bent over and knocked on my passenger window.
With her bra-less breasts almost falling out her skimpy top she said, in a sexy voice,
“I’m a big believer in barter, old fella. Would you be interested in trading sex for beer?”

                      I thought about it for a second and said “What kinda beer you got”

 

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Do not regret growing older. It is a privilege denied to many.                     SENIOR DRIVER from SUN CITY CENTER My neighbor was working in his yard when he was startled by a late model car that came crashing through his hedge and ended up in his front lawn. He rushed to help an elderly lady driver out of the car and sat her down on a lawn chair. He said with excitement, “you appear quite elderly to be driving.” “Well, yes, I am,” she replied proudly. “I’ll be 97 next month, and I am now old enough that I don’t even need a driver’s license anymore. “The last time I went to my doctor, he examined me and asked if I had a driver’s license. I told him yes and handed it to him. He took scissors out of the drawer, cut the license into pieces, and threw them in the waste basket, saying, ‘You won’t need this anymore,’ so I thanked him and left!” Just wanted to say Hi, AND HOPE YOU HAVE A GREAT DAY!     A smile – is a sign of joy.     A hug – is a sign of love.     A laugh – is a sign of happiness. And a friend like me? Well…that’s just a sign of good taste???

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And finally  —  a video treat that is truly enjoyable and connotes nice memories. . .

10 years of Budweiser commercials. http://wallythekat.tripod.com/A_Pages/AA-Videos-YOU-Tube/Clydesdales.html