Monotony Breaker 12-15-15

Today’s Monotony Breaker is mostly graphics that I’m sure you’ll enjoy. 

And today’s edition of my weekly radio show  —  “Oldies with the Old Guy” has been uploaded to Mixcloud and is available for your listening pleasure simply by clicking on the following link

Check it out  —  and let me know what you think. . .









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A lady goes to the bar on a cruise ship and orders a Scotch with two drops of water.
As the bartender gives her the drink she says,

‘I’m on this cruise to celebrate my 80th birthday and it’s today….’
The bartender says, ‘Well, since it’s your birthday, I’ll buy you a drink. In fact, this
one is on me.

As the woman finishes her drink, the woman to her right says, ‘I would like to buy
you a drink, too.’ The old woman says, ‘Thank you. Bartender, I want a Scotch
with two drops of water.’ ‘Coming up,’ says the bartender

As she finishes that drink, the man to her left says, ‘I would like to buyyou one,
too.’ The old woman says, ‘Thank you. Bartender, I want another Scotch with two
drops of water.’ ‘Coming right up,’ the bartender says.

As he gives her the drink, he says, ‘Ma’am, I’m dying of curiosity. Why the Scotch
with only two drops of water?’ The old woman replies, ‘Sonny, when you’re my age,
you’ve learned how to hold your liquor.
Holding your water, however, is a whole other issue.’


Your sweetie says, ‘Let’s go upstairs and make love,’ and you answer, ‘Pick one; I can’t do both!’

Your friends compliment you on your new alligator shoes and you’re barefoot.

A sexy babe or hunk catches your fancy and your pacemaker opens the garage door.

Going braless pulls all the wrinkles out of your face.

You don’t care where your spouse goes, just as long as you don’t have to go along.

‘OLD’ IS WHEN… You are cautioned to slow down by the doctor instead of by the police

‘OLD’ IS WHEN. ‘Getting a little action’ means you don’t need to take any fiber today.

‘OLD’ IS WHEN… ‘Getting lucky’ means you find your car in the parking lot.

‘OLD’ IS WHEN…. An ‘all nighter’ means not getting up to use the bathroom.


OLD’ IS WHEN…. You are not sure these are jokes. 



And finally  —  With Hunting Season but a recent memory  —  a look back. . .


This actually happened…..


They dressed the truck up with the guy tied down on the roof.   The driver and passengers put on moose heads. 

Then they went down the toll road Interstate……………….causing 16 accidents .




                    Yes; they went to jail..

                    Yes; alcohol was involved…

                    Yes; men cannot be left alone.




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