Most recipients of these Monotony Breakers are well aware of my long-time love for radio.  As such, I think you’ll appreciate the compilation below of old-time radio shows (courtesy of Judah Rosenwald).  It is really something. . .

And speaking or radio  —  I have the pleasure of working at WIRY Wednesday and Thursday night (5 pm till midnight  —  Eastern).  Check it out at  www.wiry.com or locally at 1340 am and 100.7 fm.  

BEFORE TELEVISION, THERE WAS……… THE RADIO ..

Here’s an unbelievable collection of all the old time radio shows. Find your favorite, click on it, and listen to all the episodes……. Comedy  Al Jolson Show  Alan Young Show  Aldrich Family  Alka Seltzer Time  Amos & Andy  Avalon Time  Baby Snooks  Bergen & McCarthy  Bickersons, The  Bing Crosby  Bob & Ray  Breakfast In Hollywood  Bright Star  Burns & Allen  Cavalcade Of America  Command Performance  Couple Next Door  Curtain Time  Danny Kaye Show  Dennis Day Show  Duffy’s Tavern  Easy Aces  Father Knows Best  Fibber McGee & Molly  First Nighter Program  Frances Langford Show  Fred Allen Show  Fred Waring Show  Gasoline Alley  GI Journal  Glenn Miller  Goldbergs  Great Gildersleeve  Guest Star  Halls Of Ivy  Harold Peary  Harry James Show  Hollywood Barn Dance  It Pays to Be Ignorant  Jack Benny  Life Of Riley  Lum And Abner  Mail Call  Mayor of the Town  Mel Blanc  Milton Berle  Misadventures Of Si and Elmer  My Favorite Husband  My Friend Irma  Our Miss Brooks  Phil Harris & Alice Faye  Red Skelton  Story Lady, The Westerns  American Trail  Cisco Kid, The  Fort Laramie  Frontier Fighters  Frontier Gentleman  Frontier Town  Gene Autry  Gunsmoke  Have Gun Will Travel  Hopalong Cassidy  Horizons West  Lone Ranger A  Lone Ranger B  Roy Rogers Show, The  Six Shooter  Tales Of The Texas Rangers Detective  Barry Craig  Boston Blackie  Broadway Is My Beat  Casey, Crime Photographer  Chase, The  Crime Classics  Crime Club  Crime Does Not Pay  Danger, Dr. Danfield  Dick Tracy  Dragnet  Falcon, The  FBI In War And Peace, The  Federal Agent  Frank Race  Gangbusters  Guilty Party  I Was A Communist For The FBI  Jeff Regan  Let George Do It  Lineup  Mr. District Attorney  Mr. Keene, Tracer of Lost Person  Nero Wolfe  Night Beat  Pat Novak  Philip Marlowe  Saint, The  Secrets Of Scotland Yard  Sherlock Holmes  This Is Your F.B.I  Yours Truly Johnny Dollar Mystery  Adventures By Morse  Arch Obler’s Plays  Beyond Midnight  Black Museum  Cloak and Dagger  Clock, The  Creaking Door  Dangerous Assignment  Dark Fantasy  Dark Venture  Darkness  David Harding Counter Spy  Diary of Fate  Dimension X  Escape  Five Minute Mysteries  Frankenstein  Ghost Corps  Green Valley Line  Hall Of Fantasy  Haunting Hour, The  Hermits Cave  I Love A Mystery  Incredible, But True  Inner Sanctum, The  Lights Out  Macabre  Man Called X, The  Molle Mystery Theater  Mysterious Traveler  Mystery In The Air  Quiet Please  Sealed Book  Shadow, The  Strange Dr. Weird  Suspense  Weird Circle  Whistler, The  Witch’s Tale  X Minus One Drama  Academy Award Theater  Adventure Theater  Adventures By Morse  Air Adventures Of Jimmy Allen  Archie Andrews  Audio History  Avenger  Avengers  Big John & Sparky  Big Town  Bill Sterns Sports Reel  Birdseye Open House  Blackstone, The Magic Detective  Blue Beetle  Box 13  British Shows 1  British Shows 2  Campbell Playhouse  Captain Midnight  Chandu The Magician  Chesterfield Chicago Theater Of  Cinnamon Bear  Columbia Workshop  Commercials  Corsican Brothers  Damon Runyon Theater  Dangerously Yours  Family Theater  Fifth Horseman  Fighting AAF  Fire Fighters  Flash Gordon  Ford Show Ford Theater  Frank Merriwell  Future Tense  Goon Show, The  Grand Hotel Grand Marquee Hallmark Playhouse  Heartbeat Theater  Hollywood Star Playhouse  Hop Harrigan  Horizons West  Humphrey Bogart  I Love Adventure  Information Please  Jungle Jim  Lets Pretend  Little Orphan Annie  Lux Radio Theater 465  Magic Island  Matinee Theater  Mercury Summer Theater  Mercury Theater  Michael Shayne  Miscellaneous Music  Moon Over Africa  Moon River  Mr. President  Railroad Hour  Sears Radio Theater  Smilin Ed’s Buster Brown Gang  Soap Operas  Soldiers of the Press  Speed Gibson  Sports Thrills  Superman  Tarzan  Treasury Star Parade  Treasury Star Salute  Vic & Sade  World Adventures Club  World War II Shows  WSJV Complete Broadcast Day  Your Army Air Force

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And because I KNOW you like IRONY. . .

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FIVE KINDS OF SEX 

PENSION SEX

Two men were talking.

‘So, how’s your sex life?’

‘Oh, nothing special.  I’m having pension sex.’

‘Pension sex?’

‘Yeah, you know; I get a little each month, but not enough to live on!’

LOUD SEX

A wife went in to see a therapist and said, ‘I’ve got a big problem, doctor.
Every time we’re in bed and my husband climaxes, he lets out this ear splitting yell.’

‘My dear,’ the shrink said, ‘that’s completely natural. I don’t see what the problem is..’

‘The problem is,’ she complained, ‘it wakes me up!’

QUIET SEX

Tired of a listless sex life, the man came right out and asked his wife during a recent lovemaking session, ‘How come you never tell me when you have an orgasm?’

She glanced at him and replied, ‘You’re never home!’

WOMEN’S HUMOROUS SEX

My husband came home with a tube of KY jelly and said, ‘This will make you happy tonight.’

He was right.  When he went out of the bedroom, I squirted it all over the doorknobs.  He couldn’t get back in.

ELDERLY SEX

One night, an 87 year-old woman came home from Bingo and found her 92 year-old husband in bed with another woman.

She became violent and ended up pushing him off the balcony of their 20th floor, assisted living apartment, killing him instantly.

Brought before the court on the charge of murder, the judge asked her if she had anything to say in her defense.

She began coolly, ‘Yes, your honor.  I figured that at 92, if he could have sex …  he could also fly.

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And Finally. . .

Piano lessons

TRUE  STORY…

At the prodding of my friends I am  writing this story.  My name is Mildred Honor. I am a former  elementary school Music Teacher from Des Moines, Iowa.

I have  always supplemented my income by Teaching Piano Lessons…Something  I have done for over 30 years. During those years,   I found that Children have  many levels of musical ability, and even though I have never had the  prodigy, I have taught some very talented students. However, I have  also had my share of what I call ‘Musically Challenged  Pupils.

One such Pupil being Robby. Robby was 11 years old  when his Mother (a Single Mom) dropped him off for his first Piano  Lesson.

I prefer that Students (especially Boys) begin  at  an earlier age, which I explained to Robby.  But  Robby said that it had always been his Mother’s Dream to hear him  play the Piano, so I took him as a Student.

At the end of  each weekly Lesson he would always say ‘My Mom’s going to hear me  Play someday.’  But to me, it seemed hopeless, he just did not  have any Inborn Ability. I only knew his Mother from a distance as  she dropped Robby off or waited in her aged Car to pick him  up.  She always waved and smiled, but never dropped  in.

Then one day Robby stopped coming for his Lessons.   I thought about calling him, but Assumed that because of his lack of  Ability he had decided to pursue something else. I was also glad  that he had stopped coming. He was a Bad Advertisement for my Teaching!

Several Weeks later I mailed a flyer recital to the  Students’ homes. To my surprise, Robby (who had received a flyer)  asked if he could be in the Recital. I told him that the Recital  was for current Pupils and that because he had dropped out, he  really did not Qualify.

He told me that his Mother had been  Sick and Unable to take him to his piano lessons, but that he had  been practicing.  ‘Please Miss Honor, I’ve just got to Play,’  he insisted. I don’t know what led me to allow him to play in the  Recital – perhaps it was his insistence or maybe something inside of  me saying that it would be all right.

The night of the  Recital came and the high school gymnasium was packed with Parents,  Relatives and Friends. I put Robby last in the Program, just before  I was to come up and thank all the Students and Play a finishing  piece. I thought that any damage he might do would come at the end  of the Program and I could always salvage his poor performance  through my ‘Curtain Closer’.

Well, the Recital went off  without a Hitch, the Students had been Practicing and it Showed.  Then Robby came up on the stage. His Clothes were Wrinkled and his  Hair looked as though he had run an egg beater through it. ‘Why  wasn’t he dressed up like the other Students?’ I thought. ‘Why  didn’t his Mother at least make him Comb his Hair for this Special  Night?’

Robby pulled out the Piano bench, and I was Surprised  when he announced that he had chosen to play Mozart’s Concerto No.21  in C Major.  I was not prepared for what I heard next.   His fingers were light on the keys, they even danced nimbly on the  Ivories.  He went from Pianissimo to Fortissimo, from Allegro  to Virtuoso; his Suspended Chords that Mozart demands were  Magnificent!  Never had I heard Mozart played so well by anyone  his age.

After six and a half minutes, he ended in a Grand  Crescendo, and everyone was on their feet in Wild Applause!!!  Overcome and in Tears, I ran up on stage and put my arms around  Robby in Joy.

‘I have never heard you Play like that Robby,  how did you do it?  Through the Microphone Robby explained:  ‘Well, Miss Honor, Remember I told you that my Mom was sick?   Well, she actually had Cancer and Passed Away this Morning. And  well… she was  Born Deaf, so tonight was the first time she  had ever heard me Play, and I wanted to make it  Special.’

There wasn’t a Dry Eye in the house that  evening.  As People from Social Services led Robby from the  stage to be placed in to Foster Care, I noticed that even their Eyes  were red and Puffy.  I thought to myself then how much Richer  my Life had been for taking Robby as my Pupil.

No, I have  never had a Prodigy, but that night I became a Prodigy…  of Robby. He was the Teacher and I was the Pupil, for he had  taught me the meaning of Perseverance and Love and Believing in  Yourself, and may be even taking a chance on someone and you didn’t  know why.

Robby was Killed years later in the Senseless  Bombing of the Alfred P.Murrah Federal Building in Oklahoma City  in April, 1995.